100 Days in the Making

                                                                           

November 8, 2016 will be a history-making day, at least that’s my prediction. The first female president of the United States of America will be elected, and I will have been sober for 100 days.

I’ve done a lot of reading over the past 100 days. Pouring over blogs that piqued my interest; Thesoberschool.com; and Hipsobriety.com are two blogs that have resonated with me in one fashion or another. And they inspired me in shaping my resolve to become and remain sober.

My journey of sobriety has been a long time in the making, however, it’s only been since my retirement in June 2015 from the Canadian Armed Forces and specifically the Royal Canadian Air Force, that I’ve stopped long enough to truly look at myself and realize that I wanted better for myself. This journey of 100 days has taught me that I am not powerless over alcohol. I am in fact in complete control over my decision to drink or not to. I do know and believe that for me it is easier to remain sober than to get sober.

Waking each day with gratitude vice a hangover and yet more self-loathing has been one of the biggest changes and the most welcome. In the past hating myself and vowing to do better would have clouded my thoughts all day long – at least until I got home and popped the cork on a bottle of wine; red in case you’re curious. The bottle of course would be empty by evening’s end, enjoyed by a party of one.

My body has gone through some significant changes as well in these last 100 days. Better sleep, better eating, coupled with a 25 lb weight loss, more energy, and more clarity. Not to mention better liver function (at least I hope so), and ridding my body of a boatload of toxins. Equally important, I’m back doing things that give me great pleasure and I’ve not done in earnest for a number of years; crafting, cooking from scratch, writing poetry, and photography.

Of all the things that I am beginning to discover on my journey, is that perhaps it’s not about counting days and milestones, maybe it’s just about being; being sober. Here’s to 100 more!

I whispered “I Love You”

I could not look in the mirror to see or open my ears to hear

Now 100 days sober I am longer in fear

No more haze or hangovers

My soul whole and my path clear

I shouted “I Love You”

This time I shout back to my reflection in the mirror

“I Love You too”

 

 

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It’s Time to Go

It’s time to go!

The time has come to say goodbye

Thirty one plus years just seemed to fly

The good times were many

The sad, hardly any

The friends I’ve made I cannot count

And all memories are carefully stored in my retirement account

No one but me would ever have guessed

In that, I am truly truly blessed!

Deborah Ann Matthews

2 CAD CWO

DaM :12/01/15